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May 25, 2005

Comments

Suz

What you did for your father is remarkable and his pride, entirely justified. I think that you're right about parents and children too, and even though I'm not one, I'm sure that most adoptive parents would agree.

Julianna

That is such a great idea with the momentos and so incredibly sweet that your father was more proud of you than self-absorbed about his special day.

That is so interesting (as in....perhaps there are no accidents) about your comments about adoption and the primal wound. I am just getting back from my therapist and he had some interesting points that I was never aware of........I'll try to blog about them later so I don't hog your space here.

This is such a wonderful post.

I hope you are well.

alex

Damn those were some good points. You always hit this stuff on the head. This is why I continue to read what you write because it always puts the subject in a less dramatic, more obvious, and kinder view.

Do you feel like I am kissing your ass? From my angle there is no cellulite...but I do mean what I say.

Sappy here coming up...I like you :)

Anna H.

Thank you for this post. It is beautiful.

xxoo

Kristin

Wow...what an amazing post.

bj

"I just think that there are parents and there are children, and the specific issues may be different, but it's the same shit all over."

So so true. I think people obsess about one specific issue so much issue with kids. And kids might too, but harm to the individual is an interaction between the event and the person. Some are unscathed (or at least survive and thrive) after huge tragedies (in everyone's eyes); others are damaged by small things.

I actually think that the obsession about particular issues is not an obsession about their effect on individual children (who can survive a lot) but on society in general. People obsess and flame about things like adoption and breastfeeding not because it's make or break for any individual, but because societies in which they play a big or little role are different. But, if that's the case, we should talk about the issue with respect to society, not with respect to an individual.

bj

Heidi

I read this post a few days ago, but I didn't respond because I couldn't find the words to say what I wanted to say. Sad thing is, I still can't. But I'll give it a go.

I guess most simply, I just appreciate hearing your perspective, that of an adoptee. Once we bring our child home, I know that there will be issues and hurdles as we navigate our way through the years, but I love the bottom line: "If it wasn't one thing, it would be another." I just have to accept that this will be one of our "things."

Thank you for putting it all so well. I love this post.

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